I’m 53. Post-menopausal. Over-fat my entire adult life. Fighting the fat fight – the negative body image fight since I was a teenager.
Today I read an article about how a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association indicates that women MY AGE (i.e. middle-aged women) need a minimum of 1 hour of moderate exercise per day simply to maintain our current weight. Sometimes it seems overwhelming and unbelievable to think that I can actually – in this lifetime – become a more fit and healthy version of myself. I mean really….is it possible or is this a pipe dream I should simply just give up on?
I can certainly understand how women throw in the towel and say “fuck it” and dive head first back into the food.
I understand it – but I’m not going to go there. Well, at least not today. Today I got up and went for my morning walk. Then I did my morning meditation. And, I will do my kettlebell routine later.
I do these things not because I necessarily WANT to. And I certainly don’t do these things because I’m motivated to have a certain body size. Honestly – I do these things for my health. I do these things because I don’t want to be old AND decrepit. I want to be able to walk and do yoga and swing my kettlebells for as long as possible. I don’t want to have a hip or knee replacement surgery. I don’t want to become a diabetic or have health issues. The one thing I can do today to help prevent these things is to keep doing what I’m doing – even if I don’t WANT to do them.
Discouraged? Yeah – at times. It’s easy to lose focus. To lose motivation. To lose hope. The softer easier thing to do is sit on the couch and read. It’s easier to shove food in the ol’ pie hole rather than examine WHY I’m eating when I’m not hungry. It’s easier to eat meat pies, bread, crackers and sugar than to prepare healthy whole-food meals.
Give up? Not today. Today I’m pushing through the discouragement. Today I’m pushing myself to do my KB workout. Today I’m taking care of myself by doing some restorative yoga and some mobility work. Today – I refuse to give up. Age be dammed. Although it’s hard to find middle-aged success stories – perhaps there is hope that I can be one. At a minimum hopefully I can be a success at being more fit and healthy today than I was yesterday. Maybe baby steps are enough.